Bathing suit woes

I bet you think this is about buying a bathing suit for ME, right? Nope. While shopping for bathing suits for grown women (unless you happen to be blessed with the body of a super model) is akin to pulling teeth without anesthesia, I have recently discovered that shopping for bathing suits for 3 year old girls is equally painful!

Last year Lily was still in diapers so we just put the cover on without an insert and she was good to go, no shirt required. But I did buy her one suit last year when I found it on a clearance rack.... of course, it didn't fit. I made the mistake of assuming that if she was wearing size 3T clothes that she would wear a 3T suit. NOT.

So, this year I went to the store armed with my debit card and a sale flyer and bought 4 suits in 2 different sizes and 4 different styles. We have tried 2 so far. Both the same size. One is "droopy" and the other makes Brazilian panties look modest, lol. I wonder what the other two will be like???????

The one purchase I am thrilled with though is one of those sun-protection t-shirt types. I thought they would be really difficult to get on and off but it is great! Also, I have discovered that buying her boys' swim trunks save a lot of headaches and hassles.

I think next time I am in the market for a suit for me (when you know where freezes over, lol) I will be checking out swim shorts for sure! No more elastic wedgies, bikini line shaving rash, and feeling of being in public in your undies for me!

Hope you are all having a great summer!

Sleep...what IS it?

I don't remember what getting a good night's sleep feels like. Seriously. Part of fibromyalgia is a sleep disorder so I have not had a refreshing sleep in many many years. Many more than I can count. And now add in 3 years of being a mom to a child with a "severe sleep disorder" and I am actually surprised I am still functioning.

But, am I really still functioning? Sure, in the most basic way at least. But so many things have suffered. Mostly my memory. It seems like with each night of poor sleep I lose another little part of my past. There are actually whole chunks of time missing now. And of course I can't remember small details to save my life. I gave up telling people that I had seen a good movie long time ago because they inevitably ask "what was it about?" and I can't tell them. I am only left with an impression...good or bad, but no detail.

I am scared that I will not remember Lily growing up. Already there is so much that remains with me only in pictures and blog posts, but is gone from my own memory. It makes me cry to think about it. I am only 32. I wish I could FEEL 32. I wish I could do the things other 32 year olds can do, moms or not. Not even for me, but for Lily. I hope she doesn't feel as cheated out of a mom as I feel she has been.

10 years together

Yesterday marked hubby's and mine 10th anniversary. When we got married, we did not plan a honeymoon. But, being young and stupid, we decided to take one with all of the wedding cash we got instead of paying down debts (but that's a whole 'nother story!). We really wanted to go to Hawaii but, on short notice, could not book a trip there (he was due to leave for Kosovo on a tour of duty 2 weeks after our wedding) so settled on Florida instead.

It was a great trip. I had never been on a plane before, had never been to a tropical beach before (but had been to the ocean on the West coast-BC- several times), we had decent hotels, travelled from one coast of Florida to the other, went to Universal Studios and Seaworld....but it wasn't Hawaii, lol.

So, in my head only, I had a Hawaiian vacation planned for our tenth anniversary. When we conceived Lily I did the easy (thankfully) math and knew that a 3 year old should be able to stay with my parents or my sis and her hubby while Jesse and I made our great escape. But I did not factor in one teensy part of the equation- L.I.F.E.

Silly me.

Who could have predicted that we would still be struggling with sleep deprivation and stress out the wazoo 3 years after the birth of our bundle of joy? Well, if anyone could have, it would have been me. I have a habit of planning for the worst and then enjoying when it doesn't happen. But this time I was completely blind sided.

So, yesterday we did not get to go out to dinner, didn't even order out. We did not buy each other gifts or have a night of wild abandon. And we certainly weren't anywhere near Hawaii! BUT, we are still together after 10 years and don't plan on that changing anytime soon. In this age of quickie divorces and multiple marriages, I am proud to say that we are sticking out the tough times, weathering the storms of life, and haven't killed each other....yet ;)

So, maybe we can plan a tropical vacation complete with lying on a beautiful beach sipping drinks with little umbrellas for our 20th (if I haven't killed him by then!)

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

I will be blogging again. I just need to figure out where to start as so much has happened since I posted last.... hubby's return home in June, Lily's 3rd birthday this month, his new job, blah blah blah.

As I type this I am awaiting hubby's return from Marble Slab with a big fat brownie and hot fudge treat...so all I can think about is chocolate, lol.